Easter eggs 03/04/2015 10:25

tirinha
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Original: Ovos de Páscoa

Transcription ↓

Programmer: Alonso, where's the "Save" button on the form?
Alonso: I took off...
Programmer: What??? And how will it save the information?
Alonso: The user only needs to type down, R, up, L, Y, B
Programmer: Are you crazy??
Alonso: No... I was reading about easter eggs so I put one in the system...
Programmer: FACEPALM!

Hurry up the development 02/04/2015 22:23

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Original: Adiantar a entrega

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real story;
string sender;
sender = "Alezio Wanderley";

Manager: We need to hurry up the development in two days. Is it possible to deliver the system tomorrow?
Programmer: No way. It's too much for short time... I can deliver it on the appointed day...
Manager (whispering): Ok, tell me What do you need to deliver it tomorrow, then I can get it to you...
Programmer: I need two more days...
--
T-shirt: Stack overflow

Great initiative 01/04/2015 09:48

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Original: Ótima iniciativa

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string sender;
sender = "Nairon";

Boss: From today you'll be solo at the project, because our customer only have funds to one man/hour
Programmer: So, the deadline will be changed?
Boss: No, it will remain the same. The customer don't wants postponements
Programmer: But to do it on the same time only if I work the twice!
Boss: Great suggestion! You can do this. I will tell the customer about your initiative!
--
T-shirt: I ? my boss

Did you try to google it? 31/03/2015 23:54

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Original: Já tentou o Google?

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real story;
string sender;
sender = "@adriells";

Nephew: How can I convert that string to uppercase?
Programmer: Did you try to google it?
Nephew: No... I'll try!
Nephew: It didn't work!
Code on screen: google($str);
Programmer: FACEPALM!
--
T-shirt: FATAL ERROR

Does not work on the server 30/03/2015 09:21

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Original: Não funciona no servidor

Transcription ↓

real story;
string sender;
sender = "Adriano Dias";

Alonso: Dude, the files I uploaded to server aren't working yet...
Programmer: Are you sure you have uploaded all needed files from your computer?
Alonso: It's not working on my machine too...
Programmer: FACEPALM!

Security flaw 27/03/2015 23:06

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Original: Falha de segurança

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real story;
string sender;
sender = "Paulo J.";

Boss: Our system has an extreme security flaw and I need you to fix it immediately!
Programmer: What is happening?
Boss: An acquaintance of mine accessed our system without permission
Programmer: Do you imagine how he did it?
Boss: No, he had never accessed since I told him my user and password...
--
T-shirt: Working for a genius

Invoice value 25/03/2015 10:09

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Original: Valor da nota

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real story;
string sender;
sender = "Flávio S. Pires";

Programmer: Where do I inform this increase value from invoice to the user's report?
Boss: No, you don't. Just decrease this value from total value, then it's Ok.
Programmer: But decrease it from invoice wouldn't be slush fund??
Boss: What are you?? FBI Agent?? IRS auditor??
--
T-shirt: umask 007

Designer friend 24/03/2015 21:37

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Original: Amigo Designer

Transcription ↓

real story;
string sender;
sender = "Gramathur";

Designer: Man, I got a new job to us. The client wants it in two months. I'll draw the layout and you do the programming
Programmer: ok
(Three weeks later...)
Programmer: Dude, where's the layout? I need it now...
Designer: ok. I just sent it to your email...
Designer (at phone): Hi! Jerry? I just sent the layout to the programmer. So, tomorrow your site will be online!
--
T-shirt: 404

The secret of Captain America 22/03/2015 23:24

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Thor: My hammer is magical, but what about your shield?
Captain: I implemented a callback function!

Documentation 21/03/2015 11:31

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Original: Documentação

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real story;
string sender;
sender = "Mike";

Boss: Our client said his users don't know how to use the program. So, write a documentation to them.
Programmer: Ok, I'll do it and include it on help section
(Some time later...)
Boss: The client said the users don't know where's the documentation, so make it more prominent...
Programmer: Ok, I'll put it on the screen as soon as the system runs...
(Some time later...)
Boss: The client said the users don't know that they need to read the documentation
Programmer: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: What else could we expect from the users

 

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