Integration table 03/11/2016 16:30

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Original: Tabela de integração

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real story;
string sender = "Eduardo";

Alonso: Ready! I finished the integration table from user's database to our database...
(Later...)
Programmer: Alonso, why didn't you store our database ID in the integration table?
Alonso: Well, no one told me the user wants that thing...
Programmer: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: AlonSQL Error

Hallowindows!! 31/10/2016 16:08

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Scared?

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Hallowindows!
This program has performed an illegal operation and will be shut down.
(Jason's mask, with BSOD)

Our site is slow 25/10/2016 14:56

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Original: O site está demorando para carregar

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real story;
string sender = "Daniel";

Boss: Our site is very slow, could you check what is happening?
Programmer: The internet is down, boss...
Boss: Hmmm... It could be that, right?
Programmer: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: Could be

Click there! 20/10/2016 11:23

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Original: Botão com erro

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real story;
string sender = "Rômulo Nóbrega";

(Presentation...)
User: So, the system crashes when I click on that button
Programmer: Okay, I'll see it later on your machine
User: No, as it is already open, click there...
Programmer: It's only an image, not the real system
User: Come on, do you have any problem on clicking it in front of me? Click there and I'll show it to you now!
--
T-shirt: I quit!

Gadgets 14/10/2016 04:35

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Original: Gadgets

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Programmer: So... Did you go out with gisele?
Alex: We broke up... She thought I was lying to her...
Programmer: Were you?
Alex: No... We went to my home, so now she thinks I have a son and didn't told her... She said that only if I have a child I would have so many "eletronic toys"...
Programmer: Sad...
--
T-shirt: I <3 gadgets

Earn money 11/10/2016 11:09

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Original: Ganhar dinheiro com site

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real story;
string sender = "ronan";

User: I want you to create a new website for me, because I want to earn a lot of money from it
Programmer: Okay, but what kind of site?
User: Well, you are the specialist... I thought you knew that...
--
T-shirt: I have dumb face but high IQ

Natural selection 05/10/2016 14:49

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Original: Seleção natural

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real story;
string sender = "Ana Carolina";

Boss: Did you finish the report?
Programmer girl: Yes, I did. Who will homologate it?
Boss: Life...
Programmer: FACEPALM!
--
T-shirt: With or without emotion?

Date/text field 03/10/2016 14:25

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Original: Campo data/texto

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real story;
string sender = "Zeh";

User: I want you to change the date field on the invoice to accept text instead of only dates... Because I want to type extra information, like 2 dates, for example...
Programmer: But why would you use 2 dates if you can receive it only in one?
User: Hmmm... I don't know... But I want it!
--
T-shirt: This is my life

A piece of cake 30/09/2016 16:34

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Original: Feijão com arroz

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real story;
string sender = "Felipe Kataoka Teshirogi";

User: So, the system I need is very simple, a piece of cake... So you can to it very cheap, alright?
Programmer: Well, what do you mean by "piece of cake"?
User: It's simple... All I need is that the system generates the invoices, the balance, all kinds of tags, financial reports and bank integration... and blah blah blah... Oh, and I want to acess all from my home... Okay?
(Programmer chokes with coffee)
--
T-shirt: Did you mean: "A piece of hell"?

The intern's dream 27/09/2016 10:52

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Original: O sonho do estagiário

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real story;
string sender = "Felipe Kataoka Teshirogi";

Alex: ha ha ha..
Programmer: What's going on?
Alex: Did you ever ask the intern why he wants to be a programmer?
Programmer: No...
(Later)
Intern: I would like to study medicine, but I don't want to live like a doctor, without sleep, always stressed, deal with annoying patients and to be always in dire straits... So I chose I.T.!
Programmer: FACEPALM!
--
T-shirt: :D

 

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